Listening to Townes van Zandt…
My mind is all over the place. Crack and cheese doodles. Over and over, that’s what I keep thinking about. “Crack and cheese doodles.” What’s that about? I don’t smoke crack. I don’t eat cheese doodles — not since like the 8th grade. The bar owner says he doesn’t know a Lucy but he’ll keep his ear out if he hears the name called one of these nights…. Crack and cheese doodles — I’m getting pissed off because I don’t know what it’s supposed to mean. It’s like when you’re ordering tickets online for a plane trip and yoou’re in the seat selector part of the screen, but all the window seats are taken, so all you’ve got left are the middle and the aisle. And who wants to sit in the middle? But that’s not my beef — what I can’t stand is when the person who scored the window seat is sitting there and he closes the shades on the windows. … I mean, really? Why the hell would you pick the window seat if you’re not going to look out the window? So the whole trip I’ve gotta look past two people to see the clouds outside. And they’re getting uncomfortable and I’m like, “then why the fuck did you pick the window seat then? Sorry.” It’s like that.
I guess I could wait by the subway to see if Lucy takes it to go into work. But there’s like 4 entrances at this exit alone. I’ll probably just miss her. I could go down by the turnstiles… But what if she has like some dotcom startup she’s running out of her livingroom. She only comes out to go to the grocery and drink. okay… My dad always told me: if you find a girl that makes you feel something, don’t be stupid and let her get away. My parents have been married for 35 years. They met in college at a rally. He saw her and he said that was it. Just like that. And what do I do - I walk her home and forget. And every morning I’m reminded of how stupid I am. hello everybody who reads my blog and listens to me whine and navel gaze and being so whatever… When I was young people had diaries, right?
Cheese doodles, man…
